One step ...

They say that anything less that 5 hours sleep a night is harmful to the body yet here I am at 3 am with less than 3 hours before I have to wake Tom, doing paperwork.

Some nights I just can't sleep. Emily's situation is all consuming and it's hard to switch off. Every day is a huge juggling act in which everything must be planned to the letter to give Emily the chance to have a successful day. Most days, I would say 19 out of 20 I breeze through any situation gracefully just like all is well. Keeping 15 balls in the air is my speciality but every so often it becomes a little much and it hits me that my child will never be the same. That my carefree Emily is gone forever. Don't get me wrong, I adore the new Emily and embrace her passion for life but I'm only human, this is hard!

This new week holds many challenges. How can I make ends meet this week? How do I get Emily through another week of school and keep her up to date? How do I keep Tom on track and give him the time he deserves and craves? How can I stay on my diet when all I feel like doing is eating to comfort myself? How do I keep Pete from losing his mind with worry because the housing market has slumped and he has no work? How can I pay the house note and bills? How do I keep a cool head when everything around me is falling? How can I get Emily to her hospitals appointments and still keep her up to date in school? How do I give my friends the time they deserve? How can I work on Wednesday when I can hardly keep my own house running?

The answer? By doing it all one step at a time ...